Vietnam : Seven Good Reasons

So why Vietnam and what the heck are you doing over there? Up until now my life has been on an interesting path….one that is out of the ordinary….there are so many reasons why we have chosen Vietnam to explore and take advantage of work opportunities while they exist.

Reason 1: I grew up in the 70’s and early 80’s when the Vietnam War was in full flight. Children who looked different to me started appearing at my south side suburban Sydney school. A girl called Tu Lee and a boy name Phat. Tu Lee was in my sisters’ class and became good friends to my older sibling. We got to know her and found out she was a refugee form a conflict that was merely eight and a half hours plane ride from my school but for some reason not understandable to my eight year old brain Tus’ family came by a small wooden boat. This always intrigued me.

Reason 2: By the time I reached high school in my second last year History class in the late 80’s the syllabus was all about the after effects of the discord between neighbouring countries in this region of the world. Remembering this was an era that still depended on text books for teaching about historical events and current events were kept up to date via the newspapers delivered by the paper boy at your front door. I was given an assessment by Mrs Smith my History teacher to collect any article I could find in the local news about Vietnam and Cambodia. I was dumb founded by the horror that I discovered. People being killed, skulls piled up high in photographs of evidence of mass slaughters. Children being born with deformities because of exposure to chemical warfare, people who had limbs missing due to land minds and little innocent children losing fingers and toes and having chronic skin conditions having been covered in a mist of yellow vapour that masked everything in its path of destruction. Agent Orange was an herbicide that desolated everything in its path….not just the jungle clearing within a week but also all those who came into contact with it…including US and Australian troops and the local people. My heart went out to all those involved and I had a strange feeling that one day I would see this land first hand.

Reason 3: In the mid 90’s I made friends with a beautiful family who had 5 daughters. Four of the daughters were of natural birth and the fifth daughter Kelly was adopted from an orphanage in Vietnam when she was a toddler. Kelly was the same age as me when we met…21…but she seemed so much younger. She had a childlike innocence about her and I bet she still does today. Kelly had brain damage. The Australian doctors had found shrapnel in her head and also the remains of nails that had been driven into her skull by witch doctors to cure the shrapnel injury. (Side note…I don’t think the Witch Doctor obtained a legitimate degree) When I had each of my babies I made sure that Kelly had the opportunity to nurse them with her good arm while we sat in church each Sunday. I could tell by the massive smile on her face that babies made her happy and that she longed for one of her own. Her maternal instincts were ever present in spite of her acquired brain injuries. Kelly and her loving family touched my heart.

Reason 4: I have heard it said that Mormons are a peculiar people….I would have to 100% agree with you. Mormons believe in latter-day revelation. We believe in personal revelation by one who is ordained to give a special patriarchal blessing that can help guide us in our own journey. “Every worthy, baptized member is entitled to and should receive a patriarchal blessing, which provides inspired direction from the Lord. Patriarchal blessings include a declaration of a person’s lineage in the house of Israel and contain personal counsel from the Lord. As a person studies his or her patriarchal blessing and follows the counsel it contains, it will provide guidance, comfort, and protection.” Lds.org. Both my husbands, my own and daughters Patriarchal blessing has guided us to this point in our lives, and yes some might think this is peculiar...taking life instructions from a blessing granted unto us...but everyone is on their own journey in this life and who is to judge us for the value we place on our spiritual connections. Each to their own I say!

Reason 5: I attended an Anthony Robbins seminar last year and met a woman whose life enthralled me. Her name is Minh and she was also a refugee from Vietnam. Her family came over by boat when she was two. As a child she said she felt that it all happened as if it was a story about another little girl and not exactly happened to her….this was until she saw footage of her being held by her parents in the boat and a documentary was made about her family and other survivors of this journey including encounters with pirates and wild high seas weather. Her story fascinated my imagination. I have link her documentary to my page so you can see for yourself. 

Reason 6…Employment…straight up…Although Dean runs his own business we would love to travel more and have an income stream outside of Australia. Although Dean can’t physically see the world he can certainly experience it. Teaching is a way we can give back to the world and is a job that Dean is totally capable of doing.

Reason 7: This is the most important reason….Deano and I love adventure. We have moved home 19 time in 25 years and we live to seek out new challenges, meet new people, and do new things. It’s a way of keeping our lives exciting.

Here I am on a reconnaissance mission really…to study while Deano is back home packing up our lives and all the while I checking out the possibilities for our future. It’s all so very exhilarating knowing our life is going to change once again!

So I invite you to read along, make comments, ask questions as I let you know about the strange yet thrilling experience that I am having here in Vietnam…and share with me the sights, the culture but perhaps not the smells that come from this fascinating land with it smiling kind hearted people. 

Parting is such Sweet Sorrow

Just over 8 weeks ago I heard the some of the worst news I have ever heard in my whole life time. There is only one other time that will equal this news that I can remember and this was when my mother called me to say that my dear cousin had died in a car accident. It’s the type of news no one wants to hear especially when it’s about a person you hold dear to your heart.  The news that a loved one will be taken before they are old.

As we sat in the hospital at the bedside of my mother-in-law waiting for the specialist to arrive the chatter was light hearted, thinking that what was ailing this sweet woman was going to be fixed by the experts that had trained for years to enable people to reach their full potential. As we sat and listened to the young looking doctor, expecting her to tell us all about a treatment that could help whatever the issue was that had turned my dear loved Julie an iridescent shade of yellow, the news was sadly not what we wanted to hear. In essence this noble woman that had raised six children, three of which were blind was given 3 months to live….WHAT???

As the days turned into weeks we watched the cancer far too quickly take over her body, it took her ability to function on her own away without notice it seemed. With my Father-in-law as her primary carer and my husband on call to help lift her out of bed it became a very confronting situation. My heart broke as she told me she was going into palliative care six and a half weeks out from her initial diagnosis. Just four days later she was gone.

In this situation although it is painful there are some moments of gratitude that I wanted to touch on. I am forever grateful that my husband was there for his mother in her last week’s here on earth. He said to me “It was an honour to serve her”
 I am grateful to have been there to see that she and her husband had food on the table and share our meals with them over this time. 
I am forever thankful for the conversations we shared over this period, an opportunity to treasure up special moments of memories that she told to my husband about her life that she had never spoken of before. 
I am totally overwhelmed with the love and support from others in our community who came and helped out with meals, cleaning, visiting, helping out with mobility aids, and even a personal visit from the hairdresser to give Julie a tidied main of silky white hair.
 I am grateful for those who helped with the funeral arrangements and those who prayed for our family over this trying period.
 I have gratitude for the opportunity I had to tell her that I loved her and thank her for being a fantastic Mother-in law and grandmother to my children.
 I am thankful that she told both Deano and myself that she wanted us to continue on with our life journey and plans to move to Vietnam despite her illness.

Tuesday last week would be her last day on this earth and as I boarded the plane for Vietnam on Sunday and went to my first class to learn to be an English teacher on Monday my thoughts and heart was back in Brisbane with my family and friends as they buried and mourned the loss of a treasured Mother, a friend to everyone, a teacher to many and a faithful servant to all who she came in contact with. She was a woman who loved the Lord, did not fear death even when it was staring at her right in the face. Not once did I hear her say “Lord why me?” When she left us she was ready for whatever was in store for her in her next journey. She died with dignity and grace.

As I was not at the funeral I am writing this blog post as my way to capture my feeling of loss. I followed her instructions to continue on the path of our plans, I asked her nicely to hold on until I got back from my course in Vietnam but her response was a little shrug of her shoulders and a laugh, Julie knowing full well that her light was almost out and her earthly journey was almost over. At this time just wanted to say how much I will miss you Julie. Your death has taught me how to accept the bad times without fear, holding my head up high and knowing that come what may there is a silver lining in all aspects of life…even death. Thank you for this blessing. Thank you for teaching me. Thank you for holding in there long enough for us to serve a woman that has given a life time of service to others,

Much love your daughter-in-law forever Janelle xo